Courage

I have been thinking a lot about the many women in my life who have also struggled to start or expand their familes.  There is a wide range of trials that many women go through, Infertility, miscarriage, waiting to adopt, the loss of a child, I think we all know someone who has been there.


I strongly debated sharing my own personal story because I felt it was too personal.  However, in sharing my most personal and awkward moments, I have been faced with uneducated comments from people who obviously don't know my entire story and judge me based on decisions I have made that ONLY AFFECT MY FAMILY.


I think that as a woman there is something specifically painful and personal about not being able to easily conceive and bear a child. It doesn't matter if you alway wanted to be a mother of 5 or found out later in life that a child was something you wanted in your life. Realizing that you are in the group where motherhood wont come easily to you  hugely sucks. It consumes your emotions and your thoughts, makes you feel out of control of your own life and body.  I have had great friends who have also struggled and sometimes I feel like I am in a secret club that only we understand.  

At the end of the 3 years, hundreds of painful tests and procedures, and a very patient husband, I was lucky. I had a beautiful son. And he is wonderful and I am so grateful he is here. But looking back on the experience, and also going through fertility treatments again, I see something new. Having a child was only one of the blessings I was given through this experience. I see that this trial, the same one I cursed for so long, has enabled me. It has given me strength. It has taught me courage. I wouldn't be who I am today if I had not gained the perspective the trial forced me to learn.  

And so to those of you out there who are feeling anything like I did. Here is a note of encouragement to you. You are stronger than you know. You are not alone. You are in my thoughts and my fingers are continually crossed for you.  

Global Fest

A couple weeks ago the family all went to Global Fest.  Its an international fireworks competition that takes place here and the show is truly remarkable.  Some shows are truly art.

  

We were very excited about our treats.

I didn't get any pictures of the fireworks, but we had lots of fun.  The fair food is always spectacular, they hand out free coke cans, the older boys thought it was a little loud (the twins) and Jett started singing twinkle twinkle little star.  It was really cute and he was REALLY excited.

Jett-isms

Drawing shapes for Jett when I draw a square and ask him what it is. "A pillow! Soft!"

Family Day At Work

Jett got to ride in the big truck and honk the horn.  It was loud and mommy screamed which freaked out Jett.

They make the coke there, and the bottles, and here is some diet coke being made.  It was REALLY cool to see even if I didn't get the entire tour.

My Dream Job.

Belly Shots

This is the bump at 20 Weeks.  Here is what I looked like with Jett at 22 Weeks.  HMMMM.  I can't decide if I am huge or not because I feel big but when I am looking at pictures I guess not as big as I am imagining.

Summer Days

My son has reached an age where he wants to choose his own clothes (as evidenced here)  This day we went to the splash park with his rain boots on and the same toque he wore in that picture the other day.  Yes, AUGUST, our only warm month.  Rain boots and toque.  Talk about season confusion.  But he does look cute!

 We went to my friend Chelsea's house and she put some feather hair extensions in Jett's hair.  Mine too, but Jett's are the controversial ones.  I think they are cute and fun, seeing as how he is a little boy they aren't going to last long.  The men in the family have other opinions...

  

Jett Sat with his friend Crew while I got mine done.  They are very into DORA and both wanted to hold Crew's Ipad.  Jett was very excited (too bad we don't have one).

My friend from AZ is up working as a Nanny for a family in my community.  It has been nice to have another "mom" friend to hang out with and she is staying through her next semester of school so I can't wait for more fun times!

Jett-Ism's

Jett man made me laugh today.  We pulled into the garage after running errands and yelled out "COUSINS HOUSE".  I think he loves that he can say things and I understand and can follow his commands.  However, he LOVES bossing me around.  We get to cousins house and he picks up a thomas train, hugs it, and says "OH THOMAS I MISSED YOU!"  I laughed out loud.

He repeated it when we got home.  OH BUZZ I MISSED YOU!

Kid cracks me up.